Where It All Started

Look, I used to be the spokesperson for hustle culture.

I saw the game from an early age, and I played it because I thought there was no other option. I didn’t come from a family of significant. means, and I knew I needed to make something of myself.

After 10+ years of what I can only call “being a bad ass bitch” I was completely lost and stuck. It baffled me. It seemed like I was working so hard for pennies, and yet these ‘pennies’ I spoke of were 3x the median income and an upcoming promotion to a leadership position.

I had never “hit a wall” before, most of the time I’m the one careening through them. But something inside of me was simply not happy with the way things were going. I couldn’t understand it - I was successful, fit, and had no weird addictions or bad habits that would constitute this major crisis feeling I had in the pit of my stomach.

It wasn’t my stomach, though, it was my mind. Yes, it was my mind that had turned on me. I was never enough, or the money was never enough… but the real issue at hand was that I didn’t feel like I was doing the right thing.

It’s not that I was doing anything immoral like scamming people. No, I was in an honest career as a Program Manager for a large tech/real estate company. I solved problems all day. I was respected by my most peers, and handed the biggest clients. I was the poster child for a good corporate leader.

But here’s the thing - none of it meant anything to me. I was completely numb to it all.

Shit - so what’s actually important to me?

If you take away the optics, the status, the convenience. What do I want my life to look like? I still want more - let’s make that clear. Just not more for more’s sake.

My most honorable achievement in life is getting myself to face this situation head-on, and accepting that I’ve been living wrong. I might be a high performer, but my body is stressed out. I might seem pretty and fit, but my mind is always telling me I’m not.

My story isn’t exactly “I made millions, and now I’m here to show you how.” That’s not my MO. I’ve had many wealthy friends in my life, and trust me wealth does not guarantee that you will be happy, fulfilled, or even healthy. It doesn’t make you a good parent, or a good friend. And it certainly doesn’t mean you will have a good life.

Once again, money is great. It’s just not your sole purpose in life. It’s not the answer you are actually looking for.

And how long have you been looking, anyway?

The issue I found, is that I had accepted the “ways of society” without questioning it. Even though it caused me pain, I did everything they said you should do. Get a degree in engineering, work hard, be pretty, be nice, but don’t let people walk on you, oh and be social yes happy hours are a great way to network….. yadda yadaa.

Society was telling me all kinds of things - even crazy things like that being a woman in a male dominated industry wasn’t going to be easy. And I accepted it all at face value. As the truth. The world is like this, so I’ll just have to work extra hard to (insert image of perfection here).

We are fooled, and eventually anguished, by the rules humans have placed over the natural ways of the world. Why do you think mental disorders are as common as the cold? We have clearly created an unhealthy society.

But regardless, you did it. You f*cking worked your ass off.

So why are you here? You check the box for normal, well positioned, high acheiving, successful… what’s the definition of all of those labels anyway?

Ahhhh. Now you are asking the right questions.

When’s the last time you did something you wanted to do. And when’s the last time you did something you didn’t want to do?

Maybe that matters.

Maybe doing something you enjoy is not only important, but necessary to reach the next level of success, happiness…everything. Maybe you are supposed to to do that, and you have been on the wrong ride this entire time. Can you feel it? The repulsion? It’s telling you something so that you act on it.

We have to unwrite the narrative that runs in our head like a propaganda poster for the chains of society. What would you do if there were no rules? What things in society have you always questioned, but never challenged?

It’s not about rebellion or politics. It’s about being smarter than the system. There are the laws of human society, and then the laws of the world. Once you understand the laws of the world, you can unlock new levels you couldn’t see before.

And then you figure out how to be that, within the necessary constraints of society (laws, marketing, etc).

I’m here to say that you can have it all.

Life is not so expensive that it should cost you the health of your mind, body and soul. Rather your mind, body, and soul should be leading your life.

That’s the key to it all. Reprioritization.

And let me tell you, the feeling of knowing who you are and what you want and doing the damn thing? It’s the greatest feeling ever. It’s what we are supposed to feel.

Stop robbing yourself of our human right to pursue happiness. That’s exactly what we are here for, and we have a limited time to do it.